影子

原來心裡一直依賴著的，是自己賦予某個人某件事情某個回憶的
影子，包括意義，包括存在感
因為是自己所需要的就自私的去讓人背負了我的期待
這樣不是好事，就因為自己站不起來也不是個藉口


我依賴，但是我依賴的對象一直不對
我知道自己軟弱，一直逃避，或是自以為是面對的衝動
這都不可思議，尤其在平靜的時期


只不過是一個愛哭又怕寂寞的小妮子
其實承認就沒事了，就拉不下那個臉
只能在自己過去沉溺的美好童話裡頭尋找慰藉
畫完擱下筆繼續拋棄時光拋棄現實躲進了哪？



我只知道不能再如此了，脫離自己的想像以後
太多事情都太陌生了
我活在自己世界已久，一下子見光會不會太殘忍


依靠的東西也已經不能是自己賦予意義的事物了
否則期待落空了又不是他人的不對又是誰呢？

也許哪天我會吸入一種氫氣，然後頭脹大，就變成自己的飛行船了



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我期待著吸引我的人到來
那會是我一陣子的偶像－直到真的可以領略一些原本不屬於我的東西
那是交流嗎？我也不知道
但是那樣子是充實又快樂的
已經變成粉絲了呢



有沒有人會是我的死忠粉絲呢？或許有吧
但是別告訴我，我也還不想知道
還不夠格，還得繼續走，在那之前我先理了自己再說

met

shark.
When you talked something with me on MSN.
I really know that:

You and I were different,very much. But I didn`t understand.....then.

and,I,in the past that stupid girl, was dead.

met,and everything changes.

painful

so I wanna one hug....and take a long rest with my tears dried.

I draw

I draw you,by watching your FB pic.
I don`t know who you are now,I just remember we ever were happy before.
You never know that you ever be my spiritual support...


Everything is not important anymore.


So I draw you,the man I have ever seen and known.

I see you in my dreams.

many times,recently.
I don`t know why I always meet you in my dreams but not in reality,
we haven`t seen each other for several months...
no contact, no words,even on facebook,we felt like stranger.

But we looked like partner, I was so close to you......


maybe,we can`t back the time we were close,so I missed you,so I saw you by gother ways.


sweet sweet dream.


your art always surprised me,and I will find my way for my life of art.


miss you,and I miss(lost) you.

I need a deeply sleep

我是天生的憂鬱者嗎？我想沒有人天生就想是或是應該是
因此對於某些言論我不感到受傷，我只感到遺憾
我就是多想了那麼一點因此才是多餘的
能夠的話我也希望能換掉我所有腦細胞


這邊部落格似乎挺好用的，可惜無名搬不過來


Ania Tomicka是我目前最欣賞的插畫家之一，因為還沒錢收藏畫作
就試著畫出筆觸吧？
這張沒有模仿成分，純粹只是想畫出安眠的感覺
這樣好舒服


有時候就想這樣別醒來，可以說我不活在現實，我認了